Rose Ouwehand

Peace and Contentment

People have often said "If only I could live my life over again!" My only regret is that I never knew the Lord earlier in my life.

Of course I always believed in God. When I was in my early 50s I suffered with nerves and very deep depression. I was under the doctor and taking tranquilizers, which were not doing much for me. Sometimes I felt worse. I had all I wanted, a good husband, a nice home and no money problems. I should have been happy but I wasn't. Nothing satisfied me.

I have never been out to work, so I had lots of time on my hands to do what I wanted. I kept myself busy at home doing all my own decorating and gardening, always busy with different hobbies. But I always felt lonely and empty and felt something was missing in my life. I felt so depressed, my only thought was to end it all.

One night before going to bed I snapped and took an overdose of sleeping tablets. My husband found me the next morning and couldn't wake me. I don't remember what happened in hospital. I only know that when I came home I felt very guilty and ashamed to think how selfish I was to do this to my family.

My family were grown up. My four children were married and settled down. My youngest son Jeffrey, decided to work abroad, and after some time went to Israel to work on a Kibbutz. After a while he came home, and said he had met a nice girl (Maria). She was a born-again Christian and spent a lot of time having Bible Studies. Then he gave his life to the Lord. I never understood really what he meant by that; I only know there was a great change in him. Then Maria came home to England and they were going to get married. She wanted to find an Elim church, and we found Gun Hill. So I started to come to church with them.

I found it good. I felt uplifted with everything that was said. Then I suddenly knew what it was to have the Lord in my life. Things had some meaning in my life. We always sat at the back of the Church, and many times we were asked if we wanted to give our lives to the Lord, to come forward to the front. I felt hesitant about this, (although I wanted to) but felt embarrassed, because I was feeling old among the congregation. Most of them were very young, so I never went forward.

One Evening Jeff asked me to go with him to some special meetings at the Elim church in Laindon. He said there was going to be an evangelist there. I didn't want to go. I was in a lot of pain with my knee. I suffered with Arthritis and could hardly walk at times, so I said, "No!" but after some persuasion I went. Someone picked us up in the car, so that was fine. The speaker was very good but all of the time I felt he was getting at ME, and I felt sick and uncomfortable.

At the end of his talk he asked if anyone wanted to come forward for healing. Several people went forward, so up I went too. My knee was really throbbing with pain but something inside me said, 'You won't have this pain tomorrow'

I felt very shakey and nervous, not knowing what was going to happen to me, but at last I was up the front. As I stood before the speaker, he asked me why I had come forward. He then said "Just pray, a personal prayer between you and the Lord." He then put his hands on my shoulders, two people behind also laid their hands on me. I felt a strange feeling, as if his strength was in me. After the praying finished he walked to one side, and beckoned me to walk forward. I cannot explain the feeling. I felt I was walking on air! No pain! I felt numb. It was wonderful!

As I walked back to my seat, the speaker asked those who wanted to come to the Lord, to raise their hand. While praying I suddenly felt my hand being pushed up. Since then I have never regretted it. I know I have the Lord in my life with his great love for me there is fulness of joy. Praise His Wonderful Name! What a friend we have in Jesus! He is changing my life, as I put my faith and trust in Him. I know my days of misery and emptiness have gone. The Lord has filled my life with peace and contentment.

Thank you Lord for what you have done for me.

The Lord has continued to work in Rose's family and her husband Andy also committed his life to Jesus. He worshipped at The Church at Gun Hill, but in June 2010 went home to be with the Lord at the grand age of 89 years. Some of Andy's relatives from the Netherlands, where Andy was born, came to the funeral service when we were able to celebrate the Life of Andy and share his testimony of salvation in the Lord Jesus Christ. We even sang a verse of one of the hymns in Dutch.

The Church at Gun Hill is an Elim Pentecostal Church
Elim Foursquare Gospel Alliance :: Registered Charity 251549 (England & Wales)